and knocked me off my feet.
'No more' I said to these past yet present grief,
trying to forget the simple words you speak.
All those memories are diving deep,
to somewhere far you wouldn't believe.
Once again I am left to bleed,
praying that someday our paths may meet.
Even if you never notice,
promises made I would still keep.
Flashing back a month ago when I felt like this incident was so earth-shattering to me, I thanks my parents who showered me with love unconditionally during my downtime and remind me that I am always loved. And I thanks god for shining her blessings upon my soul. Last not least Jingyi and Weiqi who pulled me out of the whirlpool. I guess I lamented too much, expected too much from a wrong person..
For once I have to agree that being emotionally independent is far more important than anything else because when you are not, you would think of all means or even do anything to get rid of those negative thoughts in you. Everything will eventually settle, whether your terrible emotions, or whatever bad day, thence it is not the matter of who puts this an end but the growth in you counts a bigger part. Shall I say that the trust within has shattered, or shall I believe that walls are building up around me. For whoever you see me as, I will not freaking care anymore, neither will I seek for your help during my downtime because again and again you proved me my idea is RIGHTER than what you have tried to persuade.
It's a long month, it feels like I have grown up in such a short period of time. Universities applications, academic, finals, friendship problem and some internal conflicts have got all out of me. Tormented mentally, I just want to get all these frustrations out of my chest, for I have been bottling up too long to an extent that I hurt myself protecting others.
(To whoever reading this, you might not be able to decode everything I just wrote. Well they are written in such a way for me to understand only. Hehe.)
(To you whom I might refer to, no worries I have already moved on from the bleakness and rising to shine. I would still be there until the day I am no longer needed.)
